Bob Raissman: No sparks fly as Mike Francesa and Mad Dog reunite on a very polite episode of ‘First Take’

Call it poetic justice, symmetry, or dumb luck, that on the day Tom Brady retired for the second time, a guy who once did the same thing, Mike (Sports Pope) Francesa, made his debut on ESPN’s “First Take” in a “reunion” with his former radio partner, Christopher (Mad Dog) Russo.
“First Take’s” regular preachers, Molly Qerim and Stephen A. Smith, didn’t take advantage of Francesa’s intimate knowledge of double-retiring (Not even a: “Mike, what’s it like to retire than change your mind?”) during the two-hour session.
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Yet the regular “First Take” duo and, Mad Dog, who was riding shotgun (did he leave his feistiness in the Green Room?), allowed the Pope to once again — figuratively— stroll to the balcony, gaze down at the unwashed masses and proclaim Brady’s career as an NFL game analyst on Fox over before it even started.
“It takes a certain personality and a certain mindset to be a good [TV] analyst. I don’t think he [Brady] is going to be a good analyst,” Francesa, who reminded his congregants what a flop Joe Montana was as an NFL analyst on NBC, said.
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“He [Brady] is not going to be bombastic. I don’t think he’s got an oversized personality outside of being Tom Brady,” Francesa said. “I think he will find other things he likes more than announcing. I just don’t see the connection. Not every great player is going to be a great analyst.”
[ Tom Brady announces his retirement (again), says exit from NFL is ‘for good’ this time ]
Francesa’s proclamation came in response to SAS saying Brady “knows there’s a right way to play the game” and would use that to his advantage by calling out players on TV who were not doing it the right way.
At that point someone on the panel, if only to inject some juice into the show, should have challenged Francesa. Instead, they let his take slide. Could it be they all think Brady is going to flop on Fox?
Mike Francesa (l.) and Chris ‘Mad Dog’ Russo get together on ESPN’s ‘First Take’ Wednesday but fail to produce any fireworks. (Cindy Ord)
Brady topics dominated the show. Predictable but necessary. This clogged any real juice from flowing between the “legendary” Gasbags or even the passionate SAS, who remained deferential to FranDog for the majority of the soiree.
It was clear none of the panel members was going to get truly worked up over where Brady ranks in the history of NFL quarterbacks but it did inspire a few ancient Otto Graham references from FranDog.
[ Bob Raissman: Signs that Tom Brady won’t be a bust when he jumps to Fox’s NFL booth ]
The overall tone of the soiree wasn’t lost on Francesa who at one point said: “Too much sweetness for me….This is a very polite show.” Earlier His Holiness, commenting on how well-dressed everyone was, wondered if they were actually attending a wedding “or a funeral.”
At least there was a spark of confrontation when the Twinkie Munch, er, discussion shifted to LeBron James. The Pope said he did not count LBJ’s NBA title with the Lakers. “I don’t count anything that happened in the Bubble,” Francesa said.
[ Bob Raissman: Fox Sports’ Greg Olsen in tough spot with Tom Brady waiting in the wings ]
Dog then asked who Francesa would want on his team in a best-of-seven, LBJ or Larry Bird?
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Francesa: “LeBron”
SAS: “Mike Francesa, I am proud of you.”
[ LeBron James dazzles with triple-double as Lakers top Knicks in OT at King’s Most Favorite Arena ]
Nonetheless, there was room to challenge Francesa with a simple question: Why was the Bubble an illegitimate venue?
Yet, as if to convince the national audience how much confrontation Francesa and Russo once generated, “First Take’s” producers rolled moldy video of them getting into a heated radio argument — vintage gold, so to speak — over how long it took to urinate in the old Yankee Stadium bathrooms as opposed to the Fenway Park toilets.
Unfortuntely, no video aired of FranDog verbally Jolly Stomping ESPN and some of the network’s voices. Airing those moments would have taken an actual sense of humor. But this was a day for hypocrisy to be kept in a vault.
And as if to convince those watching, who knew nothing about FranDog, they were witnessing something special, tuchis-kissing tributes to them were presented featuring ESPN personalities like Jeff Van Gundy, Paul Finebaum, Mark Jackson, Mike Breen, Mike Greenberg and others.
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A predictable feel-good gesture on, as Francesa himself said, a very polite show.