Radio and TV sports broadcasters simply aren’t doing good job

Cui bono? Latin for “who benefits?” That’s today’s good question in search of a good answer.
Where parents once urged or insisted that their kids tell the truth, “the truth” has been replaced by a vague, decorated word that leaves room for the truth to escape: “Transparency,” as in politicians calling for or promising “more transparency.”
Seems I’d remember if my old man ever sat me down and insisted that I provide “more transparency” to explain my latest transgression. He was more interested in the truth.
Sunday I tuned to SiriusXM’s NFL “Sunday Drive,” a useful-in-theory, quick-hitter show that darts from game to game carrying teams’ local radio calls. And if I didn’t previously think that the simple art of broadcasting a football game for immediate nuts-and-bolts info and enlightenment was dead or terminally diseased, I am now.
The cut-ins were equal parts exasperating and satire-proof. One would think the goal of all teams is to “reach the Red Zone,” an area of the field that causes teams’ play-by-play men to holler as if they’d just been zapped by a cattle prod.
And rather than give the yard line reached — the 15 or the five — that was, at best, an afterthought, not particularly essential or any of the listeners’ business, not when compared to reaching “the Red Zone!” It was as if radio audiences could see for themselves.
5 The Post’s Phil Mushnick wonders what Marty Glickman would make of today’s announcers who spew endless gibberish for the duration of games. AP
The stats parroted were almost all irrelevant as plays were given the same meaning and statistical significance. Thus we heard about a receivers’ “yards after contact” as if all contacts are the same, and that the Falcons, facing a third-and-14, were “one-for-three on third down,” soon to be one-for-four as all third downs are the same.
Then throw in a couple of “tackled for negative yards” — forget “tackled for a 2-yard loss” — plus a bunch of “they move the chains,” a phrase for a first down that allows the speaker the option to report the new first-down yard line.
Somewhere, Marty Glickman and Al DeRogatis were shaking their heads, wondering when it all went stupid.
5 Radio personality Bob Wischusen speaks before members of the Super Bowl III New York Jets team during a 50th Anniversary celebration held at halftime of the game between the New York Jets and the Indianapolis Colts at MetLife Stadium on Oct. 14, 2018. Getty Images
On ESPN’s 98.7 FM where the Jets were playing the Pats, Bob Wischusen continued to believe he was exciting (or fooling) his audience by hysterically screaming any time the Jets did something well. He doesn’t know the difference between impressing and insulting.
And when the Jets scored a TD, he became absolutely unglued. You’d think he’d never before seen the Jets score. Well, on second thought …
Of course, TV, which gives us a reasonable shot to see for ourselves, also inspired the invention of the mute button.
During Saturday’s Ohio St.-Notre Dame, NBC’s Noah Eagle explained yards-and-distance in terms of “third-and-manageable” and “third-and-intermediate” as if we couldn’t distinguish third-and-1 from third-and-6.
As for Eagle’s use of “positive gain,” well, he didn’t invent such a foolish redundancy, but he’s 25, young and impressionable.
5 Greg Olsen is a Fox NFL analyst. Getty Images
Late NBC newsman Edwin Newman would lament the excesses that replaced simple, easily understood English. His favorite was from World War II NYC blackouts when large signs atop civil defense vehicles for apartment dwellers to read carried the words, “Extinguish All Illuminations.”
Jesse Palmer, ABC/ESPN analyst on Saturday’s Colorado-Oregon, still talks nonstop, so much so that five minutes in he’s heard as a neighbor’s leaf blower. With no sense of audiences’ ability to distinguish bad from worse, TV and radio favor such voices. Cui bono? Ya got me.
On Fox’s Bears-Chiefs, analyst Greg Olsen continued to test the limits of ridiculousness. On a nice run by KC’s Isiah Pacheco — he cut clear of a defender before running straight ahead — Olsen explained, “He stuck a foot in the ground then got vertical. That’s the sign of a great running back.”
“Cut,” as in Barry Sanders, is no longer applicable. Sanctuary!
Monday night on ABC/ESPN’s Eagles-Bucs, Troy Aikman opened the second half with, “When you look at both offense and defense for this Philly team, it’s obvious that’s where they put their investment.”
As reader Chris Dellecese wondered, “Where else would you put it?”
Cui bono?, brother. Let us know if you come up with anything.
No fair-weather fans for Jets-Pats matchup
It was like an Edgar Allan Poe haunting. Watching the Jets lose to the Pats, 15-10, in the wind and rain, Sunday, all I could hear, over and over, was Roger Goodell whispering, “PSLs are good investments.”
If Aaron Boone were as tough with his players as he is on umpires, he wouldn’t have so many beefs with umpires.
5 Aaron Boone has had some run-ins with umpires. AP
Gosh, those third-down efficiency stats tell the story, don’t they? Saturday, Oregon was a mere three-for-10 vs. Colorado’s five-for-14. OK, so Oregon had 30 first downs to CU’s 13, and 522 yards in total offense to CU’s 199. And OU won, 42-6. But who’s counting?
Reader Sanford Brokaw reminds us to wish gentleman Bobby Shantz a happy 98th birthday.
Not that it counts in the standings, but for those in search of the anti-Jim Dolan, we suggest Islanders co-owner Jon Ledecky, a NYC-bred, Harvard-educated, friendly, no-airs, engaging, good-humored, genuinely-pleased-to-meet-ya fellow.
Not only is comedian Kevin Hart not the least bit funny in those DraftKings commercials, his paid presence to encourage viewers to lose their money gambling on sports is pathetic.
We know: CBS’s Tony Romo talks himself hoarse. But he still sees and speaks anticipated plays before the snap. And he’s often right. And no “I told you so” stuff. He’s the antithesis of NBC’s Cris Collinsworth, who sees everything coming — right after it happens.
5 Tony Romo is an analyst the top NFL broadcast for CBS. AP
Here, there, everywhere: No football, this weekend, for the Buffalo area Kenmore East and Cheektowaga high schools as their games have been forfeited due to bench-clearing incivilities between the two that caused the game officials to end last Friday’s game during the fourth quarter.
As of Thursday day, Yanks’ $218 million superstar Giancarlo Stanton was batting .190, 69 hits, 118 strikeouts. All without even breaking a sweat!
Indicted Senator “Stash House” Bob Menendez of New Jersey walks into a Wawa to buy a cup of coffee. He approaches the cashier and says, “Can you make change of a gold bar? Sorry, smallest I’ve got.”
Colleges chew ’em up and spit ’em out
Phil Sellers, star of Rutgers’ 31-2 1976 Final Four basketball team, died last week at 69. RU’s all-time leading scorer and rebounder, he played 44 games for the Pistons before being released.
Omitted from his obituaries is that he left Rutgers so bereft of a fundamental education that he had trouble finding and keeping jobs. He died broke, in need of donations to pay medical bills.
Still, current Scarlet Knights basketball coach Steve Pikiell eulogized the Brooklyn-born Sellers as “Rutgers royalty.”
Sellers, like too many college stars, peaked in life at 22. But Rutgers did retire his No. 12, for what that’s worth.